NEGOTIATION :The Basics
Our communication skills are challenged daily. Whether we
are successful depends not only on the nature of the situation, but
how we deal with them. Learning to communicate in complex interpersonal
relationships is essential to developing positive interactions, , successfully
negotiating, and constructively dealing with conflicting priorities.
All these situations demand that individuals know how to assess the value
of changing priorities, switch gears quickly, recognize the type of intervention
needed, and respond calmly, consistently and effectively.
Learning these basic negotiation skills can help individuals focus on
what most important professionally by learning what it takes to negotiate
easily and consistently. Learning to communicate effectively
under pressure, and developing successful negotiating skills can
help avoid the
BENEFITS:
Zero in on the priorities in the situation
Size up any situation and confidently choose your most appropriate
reaction
Deal with impossible situations, unreasonable requests
Understand why people respond as they do to in situations
Determine if, when and how to deal with confrontations
Communicate in a way that encourages openness, cooperation and
agreement
Initiate confrontation in a non-defensive way
Negotiate agreements using the best strategies
Understand the advantages and techniques of a step-by
step problem solving approach with subordinates, co-workers, the
boss, the public
situations and people positively
OUTLINE:
BASIC NEGOTIATION
The Dangers and the Opportunities
Determining Whats in it for You
NEGOTIATION:
YOU ARE NEVER NOT NEGOTIATING
DEFINITION
A COOPERATIVE EXCHANGE OF IDEAS WITH THE INTO TO DESIGN A
SOLUTION ACCEPTABLE TO BOTH PARTIES
WHAT IS A COOPERATIVE APPROACH?
· a cooperative enterprise
· all parties come away having gained something
· common interests are sought
· a behavior process
What is the importance of negotiation?
What current negotiations are you involved in?
What will you be negotiating in the future?
What gets in the way?
TYPES OF NEGOTIATION
WHAT DOES IT MEAN TO NEGOTIATE :
· a cooperative enterprise
· a process for resolving conflict
· talking with another with the intention of changing
· an alternative to the use of power in resolving differences
· an attempt to discover a solution that is acceptable
to both parties
· an exchange of ideas with the intention of changing
relationships
· conferring with another for agreement
WHAT IT IS - INTEGRATIVE NEGOTIATION:
used to achieve a consensus solution
joint problem solving - a cooperative approach
where the problem to be solved focuses upon an area of common concern
where the solution benefits both parties
where the gains of one party do not equal
sacrifices to the other
WHAT IT ISNT - BARGAINING NEGOTIATION:
used to achieve a compromise solution
least frequently used
means win-loss: one side giving in and consequent victory for the
other side
goals of two parties are inherently in conflict, and therefore one's
gain is another's loss
decision is halfway between what each party really wanted
Gerard Nierenberg, THE COMPLETE NEGOTIATOR
This psychological sequence is the most effective approach for implementing
the theories of communication and negotiation. Communication is facilitated
when the topics being discussed move from:
general to specific
less threatening to more threatening
agreement to disagreement
GETTING ATTITUDES AND INFORMATION
GIVING INFORMATION
PROBLEM CENSUS
PROBLEM SOLVING
ATTITUDINAL NEGOTIATION
ATTITUDINAI, NEGOTIATION
Goal-to change attitudes - establish CONMON GOALS
Prepare - understand the FRAME OF REFERENCE
Establish a climate of NWTUAL TRUST
Build RAPPORT and establish EMEPATHY
WHY
· Unless you are effective in doing attitudinal negotiation it
will likely be impossible for you later to do integrative negotiation TRUST
is important for effective communication and problem-solving
· The amount of trust that can be established is usually related
to the degree of SHARED FRAME of REFERENCE The process of building RAPPORT
will increase significantly your trust relationship
· Demonstrating that you understand the problems, concerns and
attitudes enhances communication and the ability to work together (EMPATHY)
GETTING ATTITUDES AND INFORMATION
COMMUNICATION SKILLS FOR:
RAPPORT - the process of establishing common understanding
of points of view, experiences, or frame of reference
FRAME OF REFERENCE - the values, beliefs, attitudes, information
and assumptions
ANALYZE
What is your FRAME OF REFERENCE?
What is their FRAME OF REFERENCE?
Establish a SHARED ]FRAME OF REFERIF' NCE PREPARE
1 . Be aware of the probable areas where there is and is not a shared
frame of reference.
2. Through questioning and listening try to understand what the other
person really does believe in those areas that are not common.
3. Ask questions that are needed to understand the other point of view,
background, feelings, knowledge, suggestions.
4. Preplan STATEMENT OF PURPOSE and FIRST QUESUON.
5. Have in mind an outline of question, follow up each primary question
with enough probe questions to assure an adequate understanding.
DURING
· Let the other person know the specific objective of your meeting
· Ask questions and probe with follow-up questions, using open-ended
questions, beginning with words like what, why, when.
· Establish rapport by finding some subject where there is already
mutual or common interest or by sharing information related to the negotiation.
· Monitor non-verbal feedback
· Monitor process and task
NEGOTIATIONS, CHANGE AND CONFLICT
NEGOTIATION REQUIRES THAT WE UNDERSTAND OUR
OWN ACTIONS AND WORK WITH REACTIONS OF OTHERS
PREVIOUS EXPERIENCES.
FUTURE EXPECTATIONS
A= change is rejected
B= change is made without commitment (COMPLIANCE)
C= change is made with commitment (CONGRUENCY)
Change may be perceived as disturbing "psychological balance
interpersonal conflict-conflict between what you are doing or believing
and the request to change
interpersonal conflict-conflict between parties
perceived power and effectiveness of communication determine how
one resolves the interpersonal conflict
RESOLVE OF CONFLICT
A=
B=
C=CONGRUENCY: a relationship is perceived between
change requested and what is now being done
Action will depend on the situation as the person perceives it
Our understanding depends on our ability to perceive and visualize
the situation as the other sees it
To understand, predict, influence behavior requires insight into
goals, choices, positive and negative forces as they apply to the other
person
Consider positive forces and negative forces.
FUNDAMENTALS OF INFLUENCE
EVERYTHINGYOU DO OR DONT DO HAS INFLUENCE
DETERMINE WHEN TO NEGOTIATE
How to Determine What Is Happening and Why
Analyze Conflict and How it Happens
Negative Interaction Cycles,
Behavior Blindness,
Impossible Situations,
THE A B B C'S OF NEGOTIATION
Awareness
Beliefs
Behavior
Consequences
DEVELOPING STRATEGIES
? Is it an Impossible Situation?
What are the symptoms and solutions when it is impossible for
the person to comply.
Is it Behavior Blindness?
What are the symptoms and solutions when the person either does
not know what he/she is doing or how it affects others.
Is it a Negative Interaction Cycle?
What are the symptoms and solutions when the person is reacting
negatively and fight any intervention.
Is it a Difficult Person?
Inventory Present Skills and Approaches to Negotiating
Identify What You Do and Why You Do It and Whether It Works
Recognize Advantages and Disadvantages of Different Strategies
Learn Common Steps
Recognize Competing, Compromising, Collaborating, Avoiding and Accommodating
Styles
Understand the Advantages and Disadvantages of Each Approach
Determine the Best Strategy to Produce the Most Desirable Outcome
Personal Inventory What skills and approaches do you use
to resolving interpersonal conflicts? Identify what you tell
yourself about what is going on and how that affects your behavior
Understanding the results of various positions-
StructuredGroup Discussion:
1. You blame someone else.
2. You blame yourself.
3. You blame someone else by granting absolution.
4. You assume that someone else will bring about the desired
change.
5. You take action yourself.
6. You expect the solution to our problem to come about spontaneously.
HOW DO YOU APPLY A PROBLEM SOLVING APPROACH ?
This psychological sequence is the most effective approach for
implementing the latest theories of communication and conflict and negotiation.
Lecturette:
Communication is facilitated when the topics being discussed
move from:
General to specific
Less threatening to more threatening
Agreement to disagreement
THE PROCESS:
1. GETTING AND UNDERSTANDING ATTITUDES
2. GIVING INFORMATION
3. PROBLEM CENSUS-DEFINing THE PROBLEM
4. PROBLEM SOLVING-GENERATE FEASIBLE SOLUTIONS, SELECT,
PLAN AND IMPLEMENT THE SOLUTION
1. GETTING AND UNDERSTANDING ATTITUDES
Unless you are effective in doing attitudinal negotiation it
will likely be impossible for you later to do integrative negotiation
to resolve the conflict. Trust is important for effective communication
and problem-solving. The amount of trust that can be established
is usually related to the degree of shared frame of reference. The process
of building rapport will increase significantly your trust relationship.
Demonstrating that you understand the problems, concerns and attitudes
enhances communication and the ability to work together (empathy).
How to change attitudes by establishing COMMON GOALS
Preparing by understanding the FRAME OF REFERENCE
Establishing a climate of MUTUAL TRUST
Building RAPPORT and establishing EMPATHY
GETTING ATTITUDES AND INFORMATION
Role Play:
How to establish a common understanding of points of view, experiences,
or frame of reference
How to identify the values, beliefs, attitudes, information and assumptions
What to Analyze: Applications Exercise
What is your FRAME OF REFERENCE?
What is their FRAME OF REFERENCE?
How to establish a SHARED FRAME OF REFERENCE:
Group Problem Solving Exercise:
1. Be aware of the probable areas where there is and is not a shared
frame of reference.
2. Through questioning and listening try to understand what the other
person really does believe in those areas that are not common.
3. Ask questions that are needed to understand the other's point of
view, background, feelings, knowledge, expectations.
4. Pre-plan STATEMENT OF PURPOSE and FIRST QUESTION.
5. Have in mind an outline of question, follow up each primary question
with enough probe questions to assure an adequate understanding.
How Do You Manage the Interaction? .
Let the other person know the specific objective of your meeting
Ask questions and probe with follow-up questions, using open-ended
questions, beginning with words like what, why, when.
Establish rapport by finding some subject where there is already
mutual or common interest or by sharing information related to the negotiation.
2. GIVING INFORMATION-WHAT THE OTHER PERSON NEEDS TO KNOW TO
MAKE THE DECISION
Give whatever information is necessary to satisfy the other's needs
Answer any questions or problems raised by the information getting
stage
Give what the other needs to know to make a decision and raise questions
and objections
Don't try to defend/answer arguments as they come up, wait until
PROBLEM CENSUS
Deliver in a concise, direct and orderly manner
Express concepts in the other's frame of reference
COMMUNICATION SKILLS NEEDED FOR BUILDING CREDIBILITY
Be well prepared
State facts not generalities
Listen before answering
Give direct answers
Make non-verbal communication consistent with message
SKILLS NEEDED FOR IMPROVING LISTENING:
Pay attention to symbolic content, ideologic, contra-logic
Probe questions
Descriptive feedback
Monitor non-verbal feedback
Monitor process and task
3. DEFINING THE PROBLEM TO BE SOLVED: PROBLEM CENSUS
Unpack all complaints
Identify all sources of dissatisfaction
Deal with components separately
Make single issue conflict into multiple issue conflict
Search for point of agreement
AVOID settling and defending
SKILLS INVOLVED IN CONDUCTING A PROBLEM CENSUS
Get all the problems out on the table before answering
Ask for further objections
Ask if it is a complete list
Ask probe questions to see if it is the real objection
Get tentative commitment
Order the problems from easiest to most difficult
4. PROBLEM SOLVE Small Group Problem Solving
Generate feasible solutions
Select a mutually acceptable solution
Plan the implementation
Plan an evaluation
-PUTTING IT ALL TOGETHER
Individual Applications Exercise:
COMMUNICATION SKILLS
Utilize Communication, Listening, and Negotiation Skills to Implement
your Strategy
Get all the problems out on the table before answering
Ask for further objections
Ask if it is a complete list
Ask probe questions to see if it is the real objection
Get tentative commitment
Order the problems from easiest to most difficult
Communicate in a Way That Builds Rapport and Agreement
Handle Difficult Confrontations - Overcome Barriers
to Getting Your Point Across, Defensiveness, Verbal Attacks
Motivate Others to Take Action While Lessening Their Resistance
Create Rapport, Mutual Respect, Tolerance in Controversial
Situations How Do You Avoid Making People Defensive?
Avoid triggering defensive inner speech
with a challenge to values and to beliefs.
Stop arguing and pushing your own point
of view.
Try to understand the other person's point
of view.
People will behave toward you pretty much
the way you behave toward them
PROBLEM SOLVING COLLABORATIVELY
Decide if the Conflict is Worth Confronting
Initiate the Confrontation in a Non-Defensive Way
Define the Problem, Generate Feasible Solutions, Select a Mutually
Acceptable Solutions,
Implement Solutions
HOW TO COMMUNICATE IN NEGOTIATIONS-Lecture
We are trying to influence another persons inner speech.
We want to avoid stimulating defensive inner speech.
The Impact of Inner Speech:
While you are talking to someone, that other person is talking
to himself.
Most persuasive attempts fail because we either ignore, or
try to overwhelm the other persons
inner speech.
Our success is linked directly to what the other person
is saying to himself.
Characteristics of Inner Speech: Fast, Explosive, Pieces of
Thoughts
Why Avoid Defensive Inner Speech?
When people confront each other on opposite
sides of an issue, the average
outcome is about 15-20% negative change.
You are trying to influence another person's
inner speech without triggering
their defensive inner speech.
You'll only be able to whip someone verbally
and force them to agree,
grudgingly, on an overt vocal level; but that doesn't necessarily
mean they agree with
you.
You may alienate the person intentionally
while forcing overt agreement.
How Do You Avoid Making People Defensive?
Avoid triggering defensive inner speech
with a challenge to values and to beliefs.
Stop arguing and pushing your own point
of view.
Try to understand the other person's point
of view.
People will behave toward you pretty much
the way you behave toward them
How to Understand the Other Person's Point of View: Personal
Inventory of Styles:
Traditional, Participatory, Independent
Are you Chocolate, Vanilla Or Strawberry? Applications Exercise
Strategies for Dealing with Different Personalities Lecture
How to Get on the Same Wavelength: Case Study
PACING- Using NLP
to get your point across
How Do You Speak So That People Listen ?
Why Don't People Listen?
Lecturette
Role Play: Passive Style, Aggressive Style
Communicating Assertively: Identifying Who, What, Where
,When You Communicate Inadequately Personal Inventory
Assertive Goals: Exercise- Saying NO with
Finesse
Sending Whole Messages: How to Say What You See,
What You Think, What You Feel, What You Want Small Group Problem Solving
Personal Problem Solving -Formulating Whole Messages
How To Get Your Point Across Negotiating
Elements of Effective Expression: Lecturette
Direct, Specific and Non-Punishing
Exercise: Role Play of Effective Expression
Using Active Listening to Your Advantage in Negotiations
The Importance of Listening to Your Position- Small
Group Discussion
Exercise: Stop Listening Dyad
Barriers to Listening: Group Discussion
Listening Skills Inventory--Perssonal Inventory
Essentials of Active Listening Lecture
Personal Inventory Listening Blocks and Negative
Inner Speech
Exercise: Paraphrase and Feedback Feelings
How Do You Determine the Cause of their Reaction ?
Personal Case Study-Small Group Exercise:
Is it an Impossible Situation?
What are the symptoms and solutions when it is impossible for
the person to comply.
Is it Behavior Blindness?
What are the symptoms and solutions when the person either does
not know what he/she is doing or how it affects others.
Is it a Negative Interaction Cycle?
What are the symptoms and solutions when the person is reacting
negatively and fight any intervention.
Is it a Difficult Person?
How do you determine if the person is an
person who uses a pattern of difficult behavior such as an exploder, sherman
tank, sniper, silent unresponsive, indecisive, super-agreeable-do
nothing, complainer, backstabber, badmouth, know it all, negative
artist, dictatorial person
Applications Exercise
HOW DO YOU REACT IN SITUATIONS? WHY?
Understanding Preferences, Styles, Reactions Lecturette:
People respond in certain patterns that correlate to the sort
of work they do and to their circumstances within various organizations.
Personal Inventory What skills and approaches do you use
to resolving interpersonal conflicts? Identify what you tell
yourself about what is going on and how that affects your behavior
Understanding the results of various positions- StructuredGroup Discussion:
1. You blame someone else.
2. You blame yourself.
3. You blame someone else by granting absolution.
4. You assume that someone else will bring about the desired
change.
5. You take action yourself.
6. You expect the solution to our problem to come about spontaneously.
HOW DO YOU APPLY A PROBLEM SOLVING APPROACH ?
This psychological sequence is the most effective approach for
implementing the latest theories of communication and conflict and negotiation.
Lecturette:
Communication is facilitated when the topics being discussed
move from:
General to specific
Less threatening to more threatening
Agreement to disagreement
THE PROCESS:
1. GETTING AND UNDERSTANDING ATTITUDES
2. GIVING INFORMATION
3. PROBLEM CENSUS-DEFINING THE PROBLEM
4. PROBLEM SOLVING-GENERATE FEASIBLE SOLUTIONS,
SELECT, PLAN AND IMPLEMENT THE SOLUTION
1. GETTING AND UNDERSTANDING ATTITUDES
Unless you are effective in doing attitudinal negotiation it
will likely be impossible for you later to do integrative negotiation
to resolve the conflict. Trust is important for effective communication
and problem-solving. The amount of trust that can be established
is usually related to the degree of shared frame of reference. The
process of building rapport will increase significantly your trust relationship.
Demonstrating that you understand the problems, concerns and attitudes
enhances communication and the ability to work together (empathy).
Case Study:
How to change attitudes by establishing COMMON GOALS
Preparing by understanding the FRAME OF REFERENCE
Establishing a climate of MUTUAL TRUST
Building RAPPORT and establishing EMPATHY
GETTING ATTITUDES AND INFORMATION
Role Play:
How to establish a common understanding of points of view, experiences,
or frame of reference
How to identify the values, beliefs, attitudes, information and assumptions
What to Analyze: Applications Exercise
What is your FRAME OF REFERENCE?
What is their FRAME OF REFERENCE?
How to establish a SHARED FRAME OF REFERENCE:
Group Problem Solving Exercise:
1. Be aware of the probable areas where there is and is not a shared
frame of reference.
2. Through questioning and listening try to understand what the other
person really does believe in those areas that are not common.
3. Ask questions that are needed to understand the other's point of
view, background, feelings, knowledge, expectations.
4. Pre-plan STATEMENT OF PURPOSE and FIRST QUESTION.
5. Have in mind an outline of question, follow up each primary question
with enough probe questions to assure an adequate understanding.
How Do You Manage the Interaction? .
Let the other person know the specific objective of your meeting
Ask questions and probe with follow-up questions, using open-ended
questions, beginning with words like what, why, when.
Establish rapport by finding some subject where there is already
mutual or common interest or by sharing information related to the negotiation.
2. GIVING INFORMATION-WHAT THE OTHER PERSON NEEDS TO KNOW TO MAKE
THE DECISION Lecturette
Give whatever information is necessary to satisfy the other's needs
Answer any questions or problems raised by the information getting
stage
Give what the other needs to know to make a decision and raise questions
and objections
Don't try to defend/answer arguments as they come up, wait until
PROBLEM CENSUS
Deliver in a concise, direct and orderly manner
Express concepts in the other's frame of reference
HOW DO YOU GET PEOPLE TO LISTEN TO"THE GOVERNMENT"?
COMMUNICATION SKILLS NEEDED FOR BUILDING CREDIBILITY
Be well prepared
State facts not generalities
Listen before answering
Give direct answers
Make non-verbal communication consistent with message
Exercise: SKILLS NEEDED FOR IMPROVING LISTENING:
Pay attention to symbolic content, ideologic, contra-logic
Probe questions- Applications Exercise
Descriptive feedback
Monitor non-verbal feedback
Monitor process and task
3. DEFINING THE PROBLEM TO BE SOLVED: PROBLEM CENSUS
Small Group Problem Solving
Unpack all complaints
Identify all sources of dissatisfaction
Deal with components separately
Make single issue conflict into multiple issue conflict
Search for point of agreement
AVOID settling and defending
SKILLS INVOLVED IN CONDUCTING A PROBLEM CENSUS
Fish Bowl Role Play
Get all the problems out on the table before answering
Ask for further objections
Ask if it is a complete list
Ask probe questions to see if it is the real objection
Get tentative commitment
Order the problems from easiest to most difficult
4. PROBLEM SOLVE Small Group Problem Solving
Generate feasible solutions
Select a mutually acceptable solution
Plan the implementation
Plan an evaluation
-PUTTING IT ALL TOGETHER
Individual Applications Exercise:
RATIONALE FOR TRAINING TECHNIQUES
This training program focuses these knowledge/skill components needed
to recognize and respond to situations in a fair, consistent and informed
manner:
Knowledge of self
Knowledge of negotiation theory
Knowledge of interpersonal interaction dynamics
Knowledge of communication theory
Feedback and communication skills
Problem solving skills
Conflicts, left unchecked, can interfere with the achievement
and maintenance of full compliance with state and federal regulations.
To administer fair, but firm sanctions in difficult and controversial situations,
individuals need to be able to recognize and respond to conflictual situations
in a consistent and informed manner. This program will provide tools
and techniques to identify the different origins of conflicts as well as
the types of conflicts encountered. Participants will be able to
determine whether the conflict is based on the content: the result of the
regulation itself, the result of inter/intra system or community issue,
or whether it is based on the process of interaction between the
participants: the result of individuals' verbal tone, language, manner
dress, personal presentation or the result of individuals' behavior.
This program will provide tools and techniques to identify the different
origins of conflicts as well as the types of conflicts encountered. Participants
will be able to analyze conflicts and their causes - whether the
conflict is the result of the system - rules or regulations over which
they have no control, whether it is based on the process of interaction
between the participants, the result of individuals' verbal
tone, language, manner dress, personal presentation, or the result of specific
attitudes or behaviors.
Conflict many times simmer beneath apparently smooth running areas.
Left unchecked, they can boil over and destroy productivity.
